A tribute to the goodness of God and the awesomeness of my brother

It has been some time since I blogged and so much has happened. What an eventful summer! Unfortunately, one of this summer's events was my 19-year-old brother's funeral. I have deliberated much over what to say in this post. I will keep it simple, sparing you many of my thoughts and feelings and instead sharing with you the wonderful person my brother was.

Below is the life sketch we wrote for Daniel. It is compiled of memories from my parents, my siblings, Daniel's friends, and me. It very accurately depicts his true and eternal character.

"Daniel was born on May 4, 1995 in Colorado Springs. He arrived late but on a memorable day, as it was also the day our Grandma was sent home from her outpatient cancer apartment because she was doing so well.

As a little boy Daniel LOVED dressing up as a cowboy and carried that love with him through his Toy Story years of loving Woody and throughout his whole life as he always enjoyed good old western movies.

He basically loved anything he considered “manly,” which included cowboys, pirates, brawling with Dad and Morgan, and smashing into the back fence with Morgan while pretending to rob homeruns. He also always enjoyed a good “man night,” which was never complete without sports and plenty of meat.

Along with his obsession with manly things, Daniel loved his full head of hair and admired facial hair his whole life. Daniel would do anything to improve his hair. In middle school, a friend told Daniel that if he put jalapeno juice on his face he’d grow facial hair. For a couple weeks Daniel rubbed jalapeno juice on his face every single night, to no avail.

Over the years, Daniel absolutely loved making movies with his friends. It seemed like he was always receiving some sort of video camera for his big birthday or Christmas gift, and most of his home videos would have fit right in at his man nights, full of action, gore, loud music, and other such manly things.

For the past few years he got really into skateboarding, and many of his videos started focusing on skateboarding tricks. He loved everything to do with skateboarding, and would spend hours watching and making skate videos, drawing logos, covering his walls in skateboarding pictures, and mastering his latest tricks in the garage or at the skate park.

Skateboarding was far from the only sport that Daniel played though, and he was a natural athlete. Just a few weeks ago, he tried his hand at golf for the first time with Morgan and Dad and was amazing for a beginner. But his main sports were basketball and baseball. He fondly remembered sinking the game-winning three-pointer in one of his city-league championship basketball games, but he especially enjoyed baseball. He was an exceptional pitcher, catcher, and shortstop, with a strong bat and good speed around the bases. In his final season he hit several homeruns, and although he didn’t play competitively beyond middle school, his love of baseball never fizzled. Just last week he watched the home-run derby and all-star game with Dad, texting Morgan with updates throughout the game. Baseball was something that always brought the boys in the family together.

And speaking of baseball, Daniel was a diehard Red Sox fan and loved to trash talk the Yankees to get Morgan riled up.  This past December, Daniel made a special request to give the last gift on Christmas morning, and wasn’t Morgan surprised when he unwrapped a brand new Red Sox receiving blanket for his new baby. We all had a good laugh, but then Daniel followed it up with a Yankees blanket as well.

Daniel really was the best gift giver. He paid close attention to what mattered to people, thought of and bought birthday and Christmas gifts before anyone else, and spared no expense.  He bought Shay some sparkly TOMS that she loves, a nice pair of VANS for me, a Rockies watch for Dad, a jewelry box for Mom, and just a few weeks ago he bought Mom a beautiful bracelet at Disneyland. He gave his friends generous gifts for holidays and for any other excuse he could find to give.

Daniel’s generosity went beyond gift-giving though; he also gave freely of himself and his time. Daniel always gave money to the poor and needy, and never went to a restaurant without tipping 100 percent or beyond. Aleisha remembers him treating her to ice cream on a few occasions when she was home visiting. He took Shay on a date to the movies, he and I spent hours talking and had movie nights together every week, and he always loved spending time, usually playing or watching sports, with his brother Morgan. His friends say he was always available to listen to them, talk with them, and make them laugh.

Along with giving great gifts, he also wrote the most hilarious cards. One of his Father’s Day cards to dad began: “Dear Mark, you’ve always been like a father to me,” and ended with “Go Red Sox. Fight Red Sox. Win.” He bought me a “Happy 40^th birthday” card when I turned 12, and most of his homemade cards were full of funny illustrations.

He cracked us up in a million different ways.  He was great with imitations and some of our favorites were his Mickey Mouse laugh and virtually every character from the Goofy Movie. There wasn’t ever a situation that Daniel couldn’t lighten with a funny impersonation or a movie quote. He also had certain phrases that he loved to throw around when he wanted to sound financially savvy or fluent in Spanish. He would talk about “going to the firm to liquidate some assets” or how something was “reglas son reglas” although we’re pretty sure he didn’t actually understand what either phrase meant.

Daniel also loved nicknames. He always called Shay “Bud,” Aleisha “Squeegy Buddy” and me “Seth” or “Stuff” or “Stuff America,” “Sethanie Bethanie Boo,” among others.

He also liked finding (or creating) random adjectives and then using them to describe EVERYTHING. Anyone who spent much time around Daniel probably heard him describe something as “fresh, wet, salty, nasty or ratchet,” including his senior shirt, which he printed the word “wet” on the back.

Daniel definitely inherited Mom’s love of games. He always dominated at Disney Trivia, Lord of the Rings Trivial Pursuit, and Risk. Before our Grandma passed away this past year she was staying at our house recovering from knee surgery and Daniel spent hours playing games with her, which she greatly appreciated.

He was intelligent, curious, and always looking for answers. He loved the Discovery Channel and the History Channel, and excelled in history all throughout school.

He had a gift for music, and at one point was able to play the piano, guitar, ukulele, harmonica and drums. One day he decided to just go out front on the lawn and play the guitar. He was joking about someone giving him money, and then two ladies in the ward drove by and gave him between $15-30.

In recent years, since he started working in the restaurant business, Daniel also developed a love for cooking, grilling and sautéing. He made most of our family Christmas Eve dinner this past year, did lots of cooking and grilling for special occasions at home, and just last week he made the absolute BEST steak burritos…for a man night with Dad.

At one point Daniel’s manager at Outback Steakhouse decided to start awarding an employee of the month, but after several months of awarding only Daniel his manager decided “we can’t do this anymore if we’re only going to give it to Danny every month.”

He was so deserving of the award because he was always early for work, he was the go-to guy for taking on extra shifts or working extra hours, he cracked everyone up and made friends with all his coworkers.

Daniel was talented at so many things, but was also kind and close to his family and friends.  On one of his spur-of-the-moment adventures, he moved to San Diego in search of palm trees and a job transfer. When things quickly fell through, he called his go-to boys, who hopped in a minivan and without hesitation drove out and rescued him. They were always there for each other. One of his friends recently remembered that Daniel was the first person he told when he’d decided to serve a mission, and he said, “Daniel was so excited for me.  He was proud of me.  He’s been supportive of that decision ever since.” And just last week Daniel took the time to talk with another friend who was struggling with some family challenges. He was always sensitive to others’ suffering and curious about their lives. He also loved babies-especially his new niece-and they loved him.

Our sister Shay, who is currently on her mission in Germany wrote down a few thoughts about Daniel that sum up the kind of person he was. She said “I think I could be the most unreserved with you than with anyone in the world.  I could be the goofiest, weirdest, silliest, most ridiculous with you and feel completely free just being me with you.  You have such a talent for that-loving people for who they are, not judging and just making people feel happy.”

Of course we are sad to say goodbye, but we are grateful for the happiness he brought into our lives, and we feel privileged to forever love and remember him as part of our family, our Daniel in the Lyons Den."

The weekend of Daniel's funeral was...hard and sad...for lack of more accurate words. But it was also an amazing weekend. I want to list a few of the unforgettable acts of kindness and love that were shown to my family in our time of loss:

• When my parents came home after hearing about Daniel, they walked into a home-our home-filled with selfless friends who had prepared food for them and were waiting there upholding their covenant to mourn with those that mourn.
• Nearly our whole extended family (on both my parents' sides) dropped everything and came immediately to Colorado. Many of my relatives I hadn't seen in YEARS.
• A bishop in Idaho we don't even know heard news of Daniel's death and used his private plane to fly cousins home who would not have been able to make it out otherwise
• Members in our ward paid for plane tickets home for other family members
• Our dearest family friends housed all our relatives
• Daniel's casket was anonymously paid for
• Daniel's friend bought him a brand new suit to dress him in and it fit him perfectly
• The ward not only donated all their food from an activity exclusively to our family but also brought over countless meals
• The turnout for the viewing, funeral, and at the graveside was so supportive. I especially appreciated three of my high school friends showing up to be there for me.

I know there are other things I missed. Thank you all again for all you did and all you continue you to do.

The morning of the July 22 I ran across this quote and it really struck me. Later that afternoon, I got news of Daniel's death and it struck me even harder.

“No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God … and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire and which will make us more like our Father and Mother in heaven” -Spencer W. Kimball

I know that it is in trial and suffering that we are most tested, because it gives us the difficult choice of how to respond. I instinctively felt that the only place to turn was to my Savior for understanding and comfort. I explored the scriptures with a new hunger and spent time pondering and praying about truth and for peace. 

And although the healing continues and will for the rest of this life, there were so many beautiful and sacred details of this experience that testified to me that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ know Daniel, know my parents, my siblings, know me. Their eternal plan of happiness is real. That's what this life is all about-remembering that and keeping it in perspective during times like these. I don't know what I would do without this knowledge. Repentance, forgiveness, and the Atonement are REAL. There is hope. There's always hope because of the Hope of Israel, Jesus Christ.

I'm grateful to have known Daniel in this life, I look forward to knowing him in the next, and I feel so blessed to forever be sister to such a remarkable son of a loving God.